You guys this may be my shortest blog yet, I just needed to get this off my achy little chest. (No, not heartbroken or anything. I decided to get adventurous with my Chipotle bowl today, and got the hot salsa like an idiot, and now the acids in my body are waging anarchy.) ANYWHO!!!
I'll be getting married next year... and one of the first things I found myself doing is looking at other couples to see if their marriages looked like something I wanted. Will & Jada; Portia & Ellen; Ossie & Ruby Dee; they all looked good to me. Like the idea of marriage is so chaste that it immediate incurs the fears of royally fucking it up. Then something just hit me when I found myself asking for marriage advice. No one could give me the best info on what sustains a marriage because they haven't built the relationship that got me too this point, I did. We did. When you think about it, if your fiance/spouse ever cheated or lied to you the advisers aren't going to be hurt like you would be or filled with all those emotions. No! They're going to thank whatever gods they serve that they don't have those type of problems, but they'll try to empathize... and it isn't the same.
I was watching a really awesome show right out of Shondaland, where a dark and twisty woman lost her husband. I could barely get through those episodes because the thought of losing my fiancee hurt so bad that I cried so hard I couldn't see (That's some damn fine writing). I'm consciously pledging forever with someone, no one can do that for me. Although, the business side of marriage is usually the same, sustaining the business while balancing the connection is truly unique to each couple. When I started dating her I didn't ask for advice on how to love her... I just did it. I didn't ask for advice on how living together should go for us, I just did it. We just did it!
I don't think I want marriage advice, honestly. I just want to enjoy figuring it out. That's the fun part!!! My life is one big puzzle that I'll have help with forever, and that idea doesn't scare me at all.
